February 2012
1 post
Reality
I don’t want to fall
for you like I have so many times before
I will never be yours
I wont let you in
I’ll push you away until you leave
give up, turn, and run
like everyone else
I will never trust you
I will never let myself love you
You my friend can’t be in my life
No more then talking on facebook
Never in person
You my friend are lucky
You wont have to witness...
December 2011
1 post
realizing my truth
Truth is that he may have cared but he never loved me. Truth is, is that he doesn’t matter anymore. Truth is I have better things to worry about. Truth is he lost me awhile ago. Truth is I don’t miss him, I miss the atmosphere. Truth is I wont make that mistake again. Truth is I learned a lot because of him treating me badly. Truth is I know what to look for now, now I have standards,...
November 2011
3 posts
My brother can be the most oblivious person in my life and then there is a moment when he has an opinion when he cares when he can make me laugh when all I want to do is cry… I’m so proud I can call him my big brother =D
>=(
Lets think of something to break her heart as much as possible, lets leave her lets pretend to care and then be and ass hole, lets take advantage of her and not care about that either, lets split her and her friend up, lets lie my ass off to her, lets pretend to be sweet and perfect, and how about we create a bunch of amazing memories so that she will regret every single moment we had together! I...
NG
I still hear it beating
its broken beats in my chest
the last few hours
have spent thinking only of you
and a century has gone by
without sleep
I’ll write it down on paper
never for you to read
my eyes are dry
if only for tonight
August 2010
1 post
everything is fine
my fav is the everything is fine… cuz everything is never fine, not all at once things aren’t all perfect at one time they go in and out of what we can bare to enjoy weather it be a relationship or classes, friends or sports…. i think its my fav cuz its the biggest lie
its all about what you do with what ever isn’t fine that makes you happy or sad, letting it over come you...
April 2010
3 posts
blue tears
never ending tears
stream from my blue eyes
as i think of him
how he hurt me
he broke my heart
i don’t know why
i thought he liked me
he was perfect
too perfect for me
these never ending tears
glide down my face
over my neck
to my finger tips
what am i going to do
without someone
to wipe my tears away
to tell me it will all be ok
to say it’s his lose
he will miss...
“I tend to go all out when i do things… WHAT DID YOU SAY CUNT!?!”
– Brian Bosse (smartest man ever)
dreams
why do i have to dream i hate it i wake disappointed and I’m not sure i will ever be able to not dream cant this stop? its killing me from the inside out
hmmmm?
im afraid to fall for you and no matter how good you are for me i will always miss him see him and want him ♥
March 2010
18 posts
i wish i could tell you what is on my mind, i wish i could tell you how i feel about you, i wish you felt the same about me, and i wish you could be just as happy with me as when im just when i see you… see you smile see you laugh see you focus see you sigh see your dimple even just see you be you and no one else… i wish i could make you laugh like you make me laugh, and most of all i...
Ryan
without the loud you can’t appreciate the soft
without the hate your can’t feel the love
without the bad how can you know whats good
and without you I wouldn’t have any standards
when boredom turns in
as your heart breaks
no one feels all there
emptiness fills your mind your dead
lifeless body walks the halls
goes through the motions
when will one live again
when will one not care
his worm touch
deep smell
hard lips
home like feeling
my ears are ringing
when this happens
how can you not think of
him and his glorious self
how can you not
miss him like...
could it be?
could it be
that i’m forgetting
about you
our old life together
could it erase
our first kiss
that first sweet text
could me forgetting
lead to a similar problem
down the road with someone else
could it be
that i’m learning
to smile agian
is this good or bad
letting loose
i know i will be ok
being legitamitly happy
for the first time
in so long
my smile now...
the guy
why cant relationships be obvious, why cant feelings be put out there with out the fear of hurt and despair… why cant the guy fall for the right girl, the girl that likes him back and that will treat him right the girl that thinks only of him and the girl who hopes will be seen one day by someone, but not just anyone… she wants a guy who will genuinely care for her hold her hand and never let go,...
“Sometimes shit has to happen to make you realize you’re not perfect
But I...”
– padre (via ohmysugarpie)
RB/BB
my mind is going to places
unknown and dark
into holes and through loops
all i want is what i can’t have
all i need is me but that doesn’t seem to be enough
i was content i was free
when the first words are said
there is no going back
they are out there
its too late to say sorry and its too late to take them back
the hurt has already sunk into me and my mind is already dead
...
three people
express myself
show my tears
let you in
scared
of hurt
of pain
i open up and let you in
one little word can kill me
one unknown phrase can make me melt
you have all the power over me
weather you know it or not
weather you abuse it or not
all my hurt comes from you
and your touch your absence your kiss
im so weak so helpless so very alone
“when the sky is blue and the sea is green life is irrelevant”
– Ben
“I only dance in the water when it’s rain water, given from the gods of...”
– me
Hair Bear
he just makes everything seem so easy and light when in reality it isn’t so easy to deal with. when normal people would ask questions and just need to know the details to everything he’s okay not knowing everything and he’s okay being ignorant about somethings when you are having a group discussion. even though one may think that this would cause anyone else to be stand off ish...
take it or leave it... what am i cutting off? haha
im cutting it off, the symbol of my love for him, my wish for us to get back together… im trying to get over him and by keeping it, i keep him. today i see i dont want him, his flaws are all to real and he doesnt want me any more… so way the fuck would i want him. he isnt worth the emotion or the thought… i will remember my flaws my doubts and my mistakes for i wont grow unless i...
never
ive never
felt so alone
so thoughtful
so at peace
as when im in the desert
just me and all those rocks
just me and the clouds
layered to no end
just me and the rain
barly gliding along
i will never go back to you
i need a new light
and new knight
i need someone to build me up
and not break my heart
SOS!!!!!
help anyone… everyone….. help me not care anymore help me hate him, help me just help me regret him, help me forget him, help me find someone else… someone hotter, better, someone sweeter, someone more clued in, someone charming, someone, athletic, someone with a good eating habit, someone who is willing to give me something real…. please help me i don’t want to want...
???
why do i, how can i drink with my heart and not my head…… why do i, how can i love with all my heart when it doesn’t belong to me anymore, really its lost, im not sure where it is and im not sure i want to find it…. maybe i threw it away </3
the moon
as i sang to the moon
i found myself
walking closer
as close as i could get
as i was singing good-bye
to my almost lover
to my worries
and to the moon
i found myself tearing
uncontrollably
as i walked away
i tuned my back to all the hurt
to all that is lost and to him
the love that broke me
and to every worry that ever mattered
…. and for the record none of this ever felt so...
=/
people can be so ignorant sometimes, i mean they think they know what they are talking about when they talk about love… but if you know their story it makes you want to shake them and yell, “YOU DON’T KNOW WHAT THE FUCK YOU ARE TALKING ABOUT, TALK TO SOMEONE WHO REALLY KNOWS”… the difference between those people and me, is that i know i don’t know what love is,...
February 2010
8 posts
learning happiness
before today, i didnt know if i wanted to let go of you. i didnt know if i could live without seeing your smile without hearing your laugh and without feeling your worm touch… but now even though i still want those things i realized im still alive and i havent felt your touch…. i havent seen you in so long, and i mean really seen you. ive realized that i can live without those things...
thoughts of him and emptiness
i wish you understood how much you ment to me, and how much i cared about you. i wish i could go back in time and see you and i from a distance just watch us just be…. i wish i could still be friends with you and talk to you on a regular basis, i wish you cared about me just a little bit… i wish i could read your mind and see/ understand what you think of when you think of me, if you...
FUCK!
IM DONE NO MORE TO SAY NOTHING TO DO!
FUCK YOU!
when the truest love ends… dose life end? or is love it self just something made up, just something created from our minds, something that we as humans created to make the world seem less harsh…. something to make the world seem worth baring because lets face it without love life pretty much sucks.
i know if i didnt love those that i do love and have loved i really dont know what i...
i cant handle seeing him in general any more, he was/is the best thing that ever happened to me and i pushed him away. i feel so stupid for letting such a great guy slip right through my fingers. and his family, don’t get me started, his family is amazing. they have become a part of me, the part that will never come back. i miss them almost as much as i miss him, i miss the feeling of his...
Gray Streets
the sent of dust
stings my nostrils
as i look out
on to gray streets
my loneliness stays
as your picture becomes
ever lasting in my soul
i gave you my everything
i let you in like no other before you
colors must heal me
i must change things
i can’t dream
that we are together
i’m in denial
ill do anything
to fill in this loneliness
to get rid of you
i cant handle my
blood cold as...
RB words never said
the words stuck on my lips
reveal the truth
barried within my mind
my soul
so far from the light
it stays in the shadows
of my head
no one knows these words
i want to say
but don’t
for i don’t know
how to say them
what they mean
and what will become
of them, or me
Almost Lover
the first time
i heard those words
i was ignorant
dispite the emotion
dripping from each and every word
i didn’t tear
since then you happend
my heart had risen and soon fallen
face now distrot
i don’t know what to feel
i listen to those words and tear
the meaning has changed
so drasticaly
it hurts my head
loving you
happend so easily
hurting happend just the same
...